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Near Death Experience Panel Discussion

Near Death Experience Panel Discussion

11.11 Sunday 23 July KwazuluSpirit Festival

What dying taught me and how I was wrong.

By Colleen-Joy Page

“Colleen, we’re going to cut your head open… from here to here,” my doctor said, tracing his finger along my hairline from ear to ear.

He shared how they would open the front of my face to remove the egg-size benign fibrous dysplasia tumour. If we didn’t remove it, I would go blind.
Then he asked, “Is that okay, Colleen? Can we do this?”
Pulling him aside, my mother questioned why he was giving me the details and asking my permission, “She’s only four.”
“She’s my patient,” he replied, “Even at four, she has every right to make this decision.”
I said yes to the surgery because I felt I’d seen enough to trust him with my life and would have done anything to be free of the monster-making tumour we called my bump.
I said yes, with the hope of freedom. Freedom from the gasping of adults, the wrinkled-nosed pointing from children and the intrusive “What’s wrong with your daughter?” questions from strangers. Freedom from the guilt of watching my family pretend to be happy when I knew they weren’t. When everyone shouted “Happy New Year” at our recent year’s new year party, I knew why my mother and aunt were crying.
I said yes, hoping to be free of mirrors and photographs where the little girl who stared back at me had a massive eye-brow-raising lump that pushed her right eye half closed and turned my name Colleen (Irish for pretty little girl) into a cruel irony.
After saying yes, there were CAT scans and too much poking and prodding, then an all-day surgery happened, where masked people in green worked tirelessly to free me.
Days later, free of mummy head bandages, sitting in my hospital bed with a fist full of brand-new wax crayons given to me by my cousin and aunt, I was compelled to draw a haunting vision of a colourful tunnel of light.
I became frustrated as I filled my paper from corner to corner with oranges, yellows and blues. The crayon colors didn’t look anything like what I remembered. My little hands also couldn’t do the job properly. I wanted to draw what I felt — I had been without my body flying through a bright tunnel of light.
My young mind tried to find a word for what I was drawing – and the word was home.
This home was complete love, peace and joy. No tumours, no fear of being looked at, no guilt, no secret, silent suffering. Only pure love and knowing I was okay.
No more seeing through tiny windows called eyes that could go blind. No dragging a small breakable body around that hurt. I was home.
After drawing home, I felt lighter, as if the feeling of home had stayed.
Later that night alone, I stared at my little hands and the arms that grew them with fascination, the way the fingers moved and the little blonde hairs lit by the fluorescent ward lights. My body was fascinating, but I knew I was not it. What I was, I couldn’t say, but it was something free.
Days later, while packing my bags, mom announced, “Today’s a big day, Col — your doctor says you can go home.” Home? Which home? I was confused.
When a single thought stole home
And then, a single thought robbed me. It robbed me of my peace, love and freedom.
‘My home is a place,’ I believed. ‘Like my family home.’
Because my home was now a place, I believed I was no longer there.
Like climbing into a dark confined box full of terror and pain, the peace, the warm love, the fascination with my miracle of a body was gone. My flesh changed from something beautiful and strange into a prison.
As mom drove us back home, she commented, “Your operation was very big, sweetheart,” I heard the strain in her voice. “You died twice and the doctors had to use a machine to shock your heart with electricity. So you’ve got burns on your back, but it’s okay; your doctor says you’re doing very well…”
Her voice faded as I wondered, ‘I died.’
I knew about death. Pets died and then they were gone. But I wasn’t gone; I was home.
My heart ached with the longing, ‘I want to go back. I want to go to my real home.’
The daily battle of homesickness and the fear of being insane was lonely. The belief that home was a place you went to only when you died caused me to believe that I would not be able to find it again while still in this body. So I secretly hated everything about being here.

I found home where I was looking from.
Working with past-life and life-between-life regressions (with Dr Michael Newton as a board director) for a few years helped me understand my young NDE home experience. Dr. Newton’s research and my experience showed how we could tune in to the thoughts streaming from the human body-mind OR the soul (and sometimes a mix). When we’re overwhelmed by fear and the survival programming of the body, we can feel shut off from our souls. I’ve spent much of my life learning how to tune in deeper than the surface mind to hear and translate soul wisdom.
Tuning into the wisdom of the soul was my way of surviving. This open seeing and being had begun to heal my shyness, given me a sense of purpose and got me through the challenges of my early adult life.
But I still thought of home as a place. After all, don’t many of us remember leaving earth when we die and ‘travelling’ to a home of light?
My soul clarified this slight misinterpretation (which is understandable because of the limitations of the human linear mind).
These are some of the helpful insights I learned:
A large part of our soul’s consciousness never leaves home – you are both here and there.
It’s more accurate to describe going home as changing radio stations from BODY FM to SOUL FM (we can learn to do this whenever we want to).
Home is not a PLACE; it’s what we are – the true, unchanging self – whose nature is unconditioned peace, love and joy.
The open-openness we feel in meditation, the expansive beauty we feel in nature, the unifying love and the peace that surpasses understanding is the ordinary experience of being HOME as the SELF.
Ultimately there is no here or there, only the non-dual self. The soul arises in the self and its role is to harvest wisdom.
Home is not somewhere out there but somewhere in here.
Believing confused untrue thoughts hides our true seeing and being.
We don’t need to die to be home.
Being free of homesickness changed everything. That’s why I teach the skills and tools to change radio stations, dig wisdom wells and find our way home. And to guide others to do the same.
You’re not doing anything wrong if you find living on earth hard. Believing we are separate fear-filled creatures crawling around the surface of a grab-what-you-can-while-you-can planet is heartbreaking. Finding home isn’t a magic wand of love, light and rainbows. It’s medicinal. And it might be what we need to wake up our species.
We are a species blinkered and blinded by a lack of clear-seeing wisdom.
But we can change things. We can drink from the well of inner wisdom to heal the divisive walls of the mind, claim wholeness for the not-so-holy holes of our emotional hearts and learn to live ordinary enlightened lives radiating home, even while we watch Netflix and send emails. Doing the best we can.

What thoughts rob you of your real home as the real self every day?
When your inner teacher meets your inner student, you realise you are always home, even when you forget. Like Mondays or on days when getting out of bed is an act of courage.
Dying gave me a crib note so that I would long to find it again and not get too distracted by the shiny objects of what Hollywood tells us to want.
The wisdom of home has taught me that peace, love and joy are not things to lose or find but are what the real self is made of.
Guiding ourselves and others to the true home of the true self is the highest expression of love.

Colleen-Joy is an author and teacher who guides guides. She has created over 50 powerful question frames, which her InnerLifeSkills Master Coach School teaches. Leaders, coaches, healers and guides in over 60 countries use her teachings and processes.

The Essence of Love

The Essence of Love

Live channeling with Chanel Lingenfelder at the KwazuluSpirit Festival

I AM Kuthumi and I come forward upon the Rays of Love and Wisdom to greet thee at this time and to gift unto thee a divine blessing of insight.
We gather together in the frequency of Love, for Love is all that matters as its essence is so profound, simple yet intricate, the beginning and end of all.
When expressing with love, it uplifts, expands and transforms your energy field, thus the only way to evolve and heal is through Love. No matter its complexity (even faceted), it holds Divinity within every particle of its simplicity.
What a beautiful sight to observe this planet as a collective, the hibernation of one half and the exploration of the other, playing your part in Creation, reminding you to embrace your Yin / Yang expression and Love all through it.
Let us not focus on the destruction, dysfunction and disillusionment of the illusionary world, but rather on the first and most magnificent tool ever given to humanity which is Love, for you are that.
It is Love that allows the essence of this communication. I am not a man sitting on a cloud speaking through a loudspeaker into the mouth of this being. I am a Being that filters pockets of expression into the soul and higher chakras of this channel that comes to rest as Divine Love. This reverberates through her lower chakras to take on a sound frequency, my expression and her voice. I am part of a collective, thus the name Kuthumi is a personal choice for those that work with me. I connect with different people on many levels, which is not important, but what is, is to understand what allows this communication, all of which is futile and impossible without the blessing of the Higher Essence of this being, who extends its divine communication into the cosmos, where it collectively connects to our energies through the sound frequency of silence, a gift extended unto all. So, from the Loving aspect of the self, let’s take the mystery out of channelling!
Neither do I have an office in the left / right wing of our Creator’s existence, I AM everywhere. Call upon us and we will be there, for we gravitate towards you, no matter the dimensional difference, understandably beyond the comprehension of some. All which is of form and formless vibrates according to the frequency emitted by Source, the Holy of Holies, for there is only One Prime Creator, who gifts of Itself, extended through other Divinities (Mother Father God etc.) which eventually steps down into your monadic and higher Self, as part of you.
Some may for the moment be unable to walk the intense path where spirituality and science intermingle, for that is what these teachings are about, cosmic truths. Fear, judgment, blame and anger have created an invisible ‘shield’ that clouds their consciousness. You are here to help lift those shields, blowing air (of inspiration) into those invisible bubbles, one breath at a time, as warriors, dignitaries and welfare agents, for you care about the wellness of others as your planet. You were once within unconsciousness too, yet now you are here.
The reason why I have shared this is to bring clarity, especially with the network of dysfunction created by many planting seeds of falseness.
I AM a World Teacher, not a master of futuristic expressions. I AM a Master of the Mind, of the Heart and Energy as I teach about upliftment and expansion, hence the magnificent meditation, we have blessed you with that’s to follow.
We lift you from despair into the Light, so claim your power, beloveds. I do not control anything or anyone, I am unable to and, besides, my interests are cosmic, whilst yours for now should be earthy and not on your neighbour, nor wanting to prove someone right or wrong, as your interests should lie within your heart.
The essence of Love is what allows this as it diffuses unstable energies, eliminating toxins from your world, thus the reality that you find yourself within.
Trust me, there is so much beauty and such love on the horizon and, even though many find it challenging to comprehend, you have to clear all of the garbage from your space before you can refurbish. It takes time as there are so many complexities at play, especially with little or no support for each other. On the lighter side, your planet is being engulfed with powerful waves of Healing, Love, and Higher Energies at all times, even more so on key dates. Frequencies travel from deep within the Pulse of Cosmic Existence, beloved ones, through Universes and Galaxies, to eventually reach you with the intention to uplift and rewire you (and your planet) according to your reflection from within, expressed with Love.
We implore you to hold your light and shine it out! You needn’t save each other, or the world! All we ask is that you be that light, for your light will be noticed, will be absorbed and, yes, perhaps even questioned, yet finally integrated by those around you, but it may take time. We do not relate to the essence of time the way you do. Yet, because of your light, change can even be instant! Events may unfold that will surprise, as they have in the past, so be ready for change! Let change be your friend, your lover, your mother. Understand there are no guarantees on this planet, except your exit from it.
Anything is possible; see each day that you awake as a new day of inspiration, inspiring yourself to love and, through that love, allow the frequencies of change to become comfortable within you!
I keep saying change your furniture around, do things differently, which I cannot reiterate enough, for when you are comfortable with change, things change without effort, you shift boundaries, you shift morphogenetic fields, thus old stale energy, which is a must!
During times of conflict, don’t become reactive, become creative!
We understand that it is part of the human make-up always to want to defend itself, for it is always on the defence, but we ask that you change the ‘environment’ within your brain. Rewire and reprogram yourself to think inspirational thoughts first thing, then allow that frequency, which you love, importantly to take you through the day. The happenings of the 21st dimension and your landing on Mars are NOT important! Stay centered and focused as you journey through life with Love. Love is the only way to empower and expand yourself.
Everything begins and ends with the self, thus with LOVE. No matter the tool, it needs to be ‘immersed in Love’ to work. Your toolbox is at hand, ask. Even if you haven’t experienced any of our teachings over the many years, you have other information set to uplift and inspire you. Be the best that you can be, which is the only intention behind these teachings.
We call upon the essence of Love to spread far and wide, so that even those beyond the comprehension of that which you, as lightworkers, experience, may eventually understand and integrate this and make some sense of it all.
Allow yourself time to sit on a mountain and stare into the skies of Creation to integrate Its Particles of Love. Draw from deep within the Earth the golden core essence of Love and then explode that through your crown chakra into the crowns of all else, thus, as you drive your vehicles or visualise your oceans, seed the energy of Love wherever you go.
You are a co-creator, that is why you came. Or, did you make all the effort, travelling through worlds beyond this, to sit here and do nothing? Sure, there may be some soul contract exceptions, but not for the majority. You came as a human soul-spirit being on an Earth mission to learn to Love and to be that Love no matter the challenges.
Even if all you do is to share Love, unconditional and untainted, that Love manifests. Your responsibility is to share that Love and beauty, for others to awaken to theirs.
Look into the mirror of your own making and love yourself through it by rewiring yourself into the image of that which you wish to express and love through and store this within your Sacred Heart and Mind.
Once you expressed this through the years of you own living, when it is done, it is done. Sadly, the lack of Love is so strong in so many ways amongst so many that it is often easier for them to feel undeserving, never to experience that Love, than to embrace the fact that they are worthier of more, that they are godly beings. Each of you infinitely remains a spark of The Magnificent, the Creator.
You are the Creator’s ‘image’ in earthly expression, if you will and, by looking into your eyes, It sees Itself in you, for the eyes truly are the windows to the soul, as you say. Yet you have other ‘eyes’ reflecting the Love emanating from your heart, your chakras, aura and energy field.
This is also evident within your eye that is single within the sixth chakra, reflected through your eighth chakra as a flame expression of colour, your soul and auric colours.
Beloved ones you are such beautiful sparks of Love, no matter how detrimental you may think you are at times, we know you are not. We know that, even within the greatest unjustness, there too lies some justice. We understand, even though you may not, that within the hands of the murderer, there too lies the ability to heal.
We ask that you stand on your own podium of Love and to allow the frequency and the essence of the teachings of Love to become you, to infiltrate into all of your existence and then to express this throughout.
Until we meet again, I AM Kuthumi, I AM the Lord and Master Chohan of the Golden Rays of Love and Wisdom and I greet and I bless thee in love.

Transmitted through Chanel Lingenfelder
Howick, South Africa

Chanel Lingenfelder – Direct voice channel for the Ascended Masters since 2006. After instructions from Upstairs to study Colour and Chakras she was taken through a mind-blowing ordination which led to her becoming a channel. Apart from readings and workshops, she is an eminent author.

Embrace the tiger, return to the mountain

Embrace the tiger, return to the mountain

Meet Tai Chi Master, Sifu Leo Low Ming at the KwazuluSpirit Festival

Leo Low Ming is a dedicated, professional martial artist. He has trained with the world’s top masters and practised his art for over 48 years. Leo teaches the young and the not so young. This is learning through doing. How to experience and evolve through the martial ways unfurls. Join Leo Low Ming for a unique experience. Step by step, let the master lead you… Simple taiji and qi gong movements and meditation techniques open up an energetic connection with the physical world. The western way thinks vigorous exercise that strengthens the muscles and heart brings good health. But the eastern way is different. Gentle, slow, repetitive movements release tension in the soft tissues and nerves, stimulate the organs, circulate the blood and quietly relax you. Here there is no separation of mind, body and emotions. Unsurprisingly, scientific evidence suggests that taiji can prevent illness and prolong life. Slowly, very slowly, you can feel, release, open and heal all that is bound and restricted within you.

“When the Tao is present in the universe, the birds sing.”

Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching: Verse 9

If there is harmony and balance in nature, your true nature unfolds. There is no such thing as early or late. Too much or too little. Too fast or too slow. Taiji is an art of inner peace. An inner peace arising from yin and yang, the two equal and opposite forces within us and the entire universe. Our life energy, or chi, arises through the interplay of yin and yang. Wellbeing depends on a harmony or balance between these two. Africa: The birthplace of humanity, where ancient ways can help us to see how we are part of the world, impacted by it and affecting it. Also as the most dominant species, we see how we burden the planet through our disharmony. As the Tao Te Ching says: “Empty and be filled. Bend and be straight. Yield and overcome.” Through mind, body awareness and the breath, it is time to recalibrate, recharge and reconnect with yourself and the natural world.

“…whilst this planet has gone cycling on according to the fixed law of gravity, from so simple a beginning endless forms most beautiful and most wonderful have been, and are being, evolved.”

-Charles Darwin, The Origin of Species

To contact Leo Ming visit his website at