Meet Debra Stevens-Robins publisher and editor of Odyssey Magazine and accredited publishing and media partner of The Southern Explorer KZN™. Debra is the curator of the KwazuluSpirit™ Festival along with an incredible team of service delivery and eventing professionals.
Savvy and insightful corporate jungle escapee, wordsmith, author, publisher and editor, Debra is passionate about upliftment through the power of the written word. Former natural healer, teacher and healing academy principal, Debra blends together extensive expertise in wellness, both in the corporate and personal contexts, as well as over 25 years’ experience in driving and delivering corporate wellness initiatives for local and global corporations. Student of law and corporate consultant by trade, naturopathic practitioner by design and magazine editor by choice, Debra is honoured be the custodian of Odyssey Conscious Living Magazine Est. 1977. Debra is the curator of the KwazuluSpirit™ Festival and the Wellness Within™.
Debra’s Credo “When you discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough to make room for it in your life”
SENSORIUM is a conscious touch and sensory soundscape experience that includes theta and beta waves, solfeggio frequencies, binaural beats, saxophone and vocals.
“I felt the energy move right up my spine and finally understood what frequencies and energies were…” (KwaZulu Spirit Festival 2024)
In today’s world, somatic polyvagal relaxation work has been scientifically shown to improve sleep, mood, libido and ability to communicate and relate to others. Adding conscious touch and all of our senses in meditative musical space exponentially increases the experience…
Sensorium is the brainchild of Anne-Marie Clulow (award-winning vocalist and performer (Phantom of the Opera, Cats, Sweeney Todd, Beauty and the Beast and Ballyhoo) and her husband Tim Visser fully immersing the audience into a healing brainwave entrainment as well as an energetic community healing experience.
It’s not just music, it’s a deep sensory experience that you have, as you let the frequencies, brainwaves and song work with your subconscious mind. Sensorium has the frequencies of nature and animals blended into the soundscapes, from live recordings on the South Coast of Africa and the Gili Islands.
“We wanted to create something that went beyond just a musical experience, into a shift being. We created an alignment with the nervous system and the body’s innate wisdom, that rebalanced our frazzled dopamine brains!”
This immersive sound experience creates deep bliss and relaxation, an incredible sound journey that takes you to the very core of your being…
SENSORIUM will be featured at the KwaZulu Spirit Festival 2025, 26 July, 18:30 – 20:30, A 60-minute journey, with pre-journey prep and a post-journey Q and A.
Blissexology – Recharge your pleasure, recharge your life
I don’t know for sure how it’s been for everyone else, for the past two and a half years, but I suspect that we’ve all been deeply stressed. A pandemic and planetary trauma have affected all of us in some way. It’s been a war on our nervous systems.
It’s time for peace, pleasure and balance now. It’s time for a reset. Often, we don’t recognise the actual point on the timeline when pleasure disappears from our lives, as the experiences that replace it tend to be all-consuming; they are generally about trauma and survival.
As an intimacy coach supervisor and trainer you’d think I’d be the last person to lose libido, or have to deal with the stress of a dysregulated nervous system. However, the past two years have shown me that, no matter what our logical specialities are, without the regulation of the body and nervous system you get stuck. You can’t think your way into changing things, there are physical practices required.
It’s not enough just to understand the work logically, it has to go deeper into the somatic practices to hold deep impact.
So many of us have been battling with our intimate lives, with work stress and world systems changing, our intimate relationships being put under heavy stressors.
Stressors don’t have to hold a negative connotation, in fact, some stressors can be the momentum to inspire great change, yet continual, ongoing crisis and survival mode is seriously detrimental to our health and, by default, our pleasure, connection, intimacy and happiness as human beings.
The problem with repetitive ongoing stress, is that the adrenaline in your system eventually oversteps its purpose of keeping you alive (in an immediate life-threatening situation) to keeping you from living life fully, as you become adrenally fatigued, run down and burnt out.
This often means sex, libido, conscious touch and intimacy can become a battlefield to get needs met, instead of a field of pleasure and connection possibilities.
A dysregulated nervous system eventually runs into total burnout, brain fog, crisis and catastrophic thinking, and often prevents you from being able to practise gratitude, reframing and learning, hijacking the body’s resources for crisis, not balance.
This ability to polarise your nervous system for survival keeps you alive but, when overwhelmed, becomes so unbalanced it just doesn’t really work any more.
You start feeling less alive; Less of everything really. Exhausted. In dire need of better sleep, and relaxation. Yet these are states of being in your body that your nervous system won’t allow, because it’s scared you’ll die if you relax. After all, adrenaline is sending the message that your very life is in danger!! It’s keeping you alive! Until it isn’t any more.
To be able to allow our bodies and beings to be in states of gratitude and joy instead of just staying on high alert for danger, involves a reset and restart of the nervous system.
If our nervous system is running on high alert, we also don’t have access to the connection we would normally have with other human beings, whether that’s social or even sensual. This is because we disconnect from the nervous system that produces oxytocin (the connection chemical) that also enables social decision-making.
The body that keeps you alive in danger, is the same body that prevents connection when it’s is running in unbalanced overdrive.
This is also why I believe we really haven’t been getting along so well as humans lately.
Play and pleasure for adults often involve things that are not actually beneficial to us.
Many adults ‘relax and play’ by socialising and drinking, eating junk food, gambling and indulging in addictive behaviours, which are often adrenaline hiding itself in a different place, not really relaxing and resetting your nervous system.
Most of us as adults don’t use our bodies to play any more and even sex and Intimacy can be difficult in highly stressed environments.
It’s almost impossible to ‘think’ your way out of this imbalance, it needs a balance of practices that activate the parasympathetic nervous system. There are many practices that can do this: Yoga, laughter, singing, chanting, praying, community socialising and even gargling can activate vagal toning and balance in the parasympathetic nervous system.
Or you can play with pleasure.
You can reset and rebalance through the exploration of deep somatic pleasure.
Most of us don’t really know what’s possible in the body through pleasure, deep relaxation and bliss states, because we don’t have the technical knowledge on how to access these states. I have personally experienced a two-hour orgasm.
It’s pretty mind-blowing, was intensely spiritual with my husband and it isn’t something we have as a daily practice, but having the techniques to be able to play with pleasure is deeply healing.
Nothing wrong with a quick physical release, it’s just limited in what it can do in the body.
Deep states of pleasure release the chemicals and hormones that can balance and regulate our nervous systems to be able to make changes in other areas of our lives, our decision-making, our community life, our parenting, our careers. These aspects of ourselves are all deeply impacted positively by having a regulated and balanced nervous system.
We can use playful and relaxed pleasure to access the body’s own pharmacy to bring our lives into balance. It feels like a weird idea until you experience it. There has to be a conscious decision to learn, because adrenaline will not release you easily from its clutches; it’s almost like an overprotective parent by this point! But you can choose differently.
You can choose to discover the pleasure and deep connection potential within your own body.
It’s not about sex per se, it’s about the pleasure systems in the body being in balance, producing the chemicals and specific relaxation in the nervous system that lead to a balanced and blissful existence!
There are a few paths that can do this, and Neo Tantra is known as the ‘lightning path’ as it directly ties in the entire life-generating system into the life-preserving system!
Most people are excited and curious about what is possible beyond basic sex, the levels of consciousness and deep connection and awareness that can arise and every journey is individual, the journey into bliss and intimacy.
“Integrating a practical, curious and kind approach to sexuality helps heal a deep wound in humanity”
Anne-Marie is the founder of Intimacy Coach International and certifies and trains Intimacy Coaches worldwide to run sessions with neo-Tantra, Taoist sexuality and sensual/massage skill sets, with a set code of conduct for sessions. Having been with her husband for 27 years, their passion is working with people to improve their pleasure skill sets and relationships, both online and with couples’ retreats. Anne-Marie has appeared on 702, Radio Today, Power FM and Kaya FM talking about conscious sexuality and neo Tantra, featured in Women & Home magazine and has been a guest twice on ETV’s ‘Great Expectations’ on regaining libido after childbirth.
Are you ready to evolve to a world of change? Ready to embrace life-changing perspectives on parenting?
“When we let go of rigid boundaries and rules, we can start to enjoy life more, relax more and rediscover fun with our kids,” says Dr. Shefali, a New York Times bestselling author of seven books on conscious parenting and mindful living.
Conscious parenting encourages parents to understand deeply their own emotions, triggers and beliefs and how these influence their children. Too often children serve as mirrors of their parents’ forgotten self.
With conscious parenting, the spotlight is turned around from the children onto the parents as opposed to a traditional focus concerned only with modification of children’s behaviour. When parents heal their own wounds and live authentically, without the projections from their past or the pressure to conform to societal norms, they are able to actually see the unique child in front of them. “When a parent’s consciousness is raised, the awareness and evolution of the parent is magnified.” Debra Robins, editor of Odyssey Magazine
We bring thought leaders to you: Those who take you through all the archetypes on womanhood, the maiden, the mother and the crone. Those who highlight the role of fathers in nurturing their children’s emotional development, building their self-esteem and providing solid guidance for life. Those who take us on a journey to recognise the gift that each child brings into their own lives, enabling us to recognise their path and focus on their innate strengths. We collaborate with those who share the importance of conscious nutrition for young children, impacting everything from physical growth and cognitive function to immune system strength; laying the foundation for a healthy lifestyle throughout their lives.
Join the conversation. Thought leaders and topics will be placed on this platform by 9 March 2025
For today, these words will suffice, dear reader. For it is the mystical beginning of it all. And that is what I want to leave you with. May we love them deeply, without interference. May we see them truthfully, with our heart’s eyes. May we honour their lights reverently, for they will be the custodians one day. So may we, yes, may we… just one moment of splendour at a time. Namaste, G
As a parent, I’ve often found myself gazing into my children’s eyes, wondering about the mystery of their souls. What brought them here? Who are they truly meant to become? Am I equipped for this? What is my role in it? And I must admit, those weren’t always my first questions when reflecting. In the early days of parenting, my questions were more elementary. I wanted answers, clear ones, answers that would lead me to a great road map for parenting. Who doesn’t love a step-by-step guide to life, right? Maybe something universal, that works for every one of my four kids?
But, no… That was never to be found. Ever. It was more like going to a ‘haywire’ disco and having to dance to a completely different song every 60 seconds… From classical to pop, from blues to heavy metal. Repeat. Repeat. Can you say over-stimulation in capital letters? Or just pure insanity? Well, in the end the dance must go on… there are children to care for and somewhere we just hope the answers will come through the crazy.
Eventually, if we persevere and our heart’s eyes start to open — call it a mini parent-awakening of sorts — we realise that parenting doesn’t come with a one-size-fits-all solution. Alas, there is no perfect answer, no golden rule. As with everything in life, the answers are fluid, shifting and evolving, just as we shift and evolve. So, for me now, parenting is not about finding ‘the’ answer. It’s about learning to dance with the questions and the unknown and then finding peace within it all. It is truly a matter of the heart, a sort of spiritual ‘playing field’ where our consciousness is brought under a bright light. It is within this playing field of consciousness that we can truly see ourselves more clearly, warts and all. How gloriously our children mirror us and show us our shadow sides… fun, right?
We, so easily and unbeknownst to us, become entangled in trying to do things ‘right’ —searching for systems and methods that promise to solve our parenting struggles. We look for certainty, control and clarity but, instead, we often find ourselves buried in the unnecessary complexity. We overthink, overdo and, in the end, we’re left with exhausted parents and stressed children — all of us caught in cycles of frustration, anxiety and burnout. Just to name a few.
I’VE BEEN THERE TOO. But stepping out of that endless cycle was a freeing journey, one that slowly crept up on me as I grew into my own parenting. Sure, my studies helped me but, looking back, I realise that much of it only fed into the ego — an ego that seeks control in an uncertain world. And when we parent from the ego, we begin to cling to the identity of ‘parent’, as if it somehow gives us the power to control our children’s futures, behaviours and outcomes. Remember, the ego thrives on identity. And simply by calling ourselves ‘parents’ we create a sense of authority, responsibility and purpose. But when we cling too tightly to this role, we forget the deeper truth: We are not defined by roles or labels, we are ever-evolving consciousness, souls on a sacred journey through time and space.
So, what happens if we put aside our ‘parent label’ for a moment? What do we find? We find ourselves — our authentic selves — on a consecrated journey of our own. And our children? They then too are simply their own souls, walking their own consecrated paths. For this moment, our paths align, but ultimately it is not ours to control. We are fellow travellers on the cosmic highway, together for a moment we can call ‘now’. We simply are, here, together. And within that space of sacred soul togetherness, we find ourselves free from the internal and external pressures of ‘musts’ and ‘must nots’, of wanting and controlling, of fears and anxieties. A deep profound sense of peace is discovered when we simply step into the plane of soul journeys and the eyes of our heart truly begin to… see.
When we approach parenting from a higher perspective, the role of ‘parent’ transcends the ego. It becomes this sacred invitation to a holy feast, to co-create with our children, to evolve together in a shared experience of love, trust and growth. At that round feasting table, they are not extensions of us but are equal souls with their own wisdom and purpose. Here, it is no longer about shaping our children into our image, but about allowing ourselves to be shaped by the experience of them too — allowing them to teach our souls just as much, if not more, than we teach them.
This realisation hit me in a particularly humbling way, on a very dark day. I remember sitting on my bed, feeling the weight of it all — juggling everything, feeling depleted and absolutely beyond empty. I was pulled to one of my favourite books The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran. I read his piece about children as I’ve done countless of times before, but this time it was different. So, I read it over and over again. Each time, something inside me unravelled. My ‘parent’ mould started to crack. And as it did, I simply let it — bit by bit, piece by piece. What was left was not just peace, but a profound sense of freedom and clarity. In that dark emptiness, I somehow found the grace and space to grow deeper into my own roots. (Isn’t it always like that though? The dark leading the way to the light.)
In the breaking of that mould, I uncovered a truth far greater than any ego role I had clung to. I realised that even, with the best efforts, I had nothing to truly shape or control, I was merely a witness and sometimes a guide. The pressure to ‘do it all’ dissolved and was replaced by a new understanding: I am called simply to be present, open and authentic with my children, meeting them where they were, without the need for fixing, controlling, knowing or trying. In letting go of my attachment to the role of ‘parent’, I reclaimed pieces of my own wholeness. And, consequently, I discovered a deeper connection with them — one not bound by ego or expectations, but rooted in a pure, unfiltered space of love. Therefore, I would love to share Kahlil’s words with you and journey into his wisdom from an inquisitive heart space.
“Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, and though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.You may give them your love but not your thoughts, for they have their own thoughts.”
This is the profound truth we must embrace: Our children are not possessions nor extensions of ourselves, but unique expressions of the Divine, longing to manifest and know itself. We are merely vessels through which life flows, not the source of it. Our children are entrusted to us temporarily, yet they ultimately belong to the infinite. We are to honour this magnificent gift and then surrender into it. Parenting will then beautifully unfold into an act of stewardship. Yes, we can guide, nurture and love our children, but we don’t intend to mould them into our image or impose our desires on them, for they are sovereign beings, each with their own thoughts, dreams and destinies.
“You may house their bodies but not their souls, for their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.”
Our children’s souls live in the ‘house of tomorrow’ — a realm beyond our control and understanding. We may offer our souls in love, but we cannot impose ourselves, fears, or expectations onto them. Attempting to shape their minds or spirits according to our ideals denies their connection to their own divine path. Each child is born into a new era and new dawn, carrying the seeds for a future we cannot ultimately know. How can the old then build the new? It can’t. Life goes not backward, nor tarries with yesterday. So uncloak yourself from the old and welcome everything new, intuitively sensing the way forward, day by day. Just… be present.
“You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth. The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far. Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness; For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.”
We as parents provide a dynamic foundation from which our children can be launched into the ever-unfolding new world. Like the bow, we can bend and sometimes endure challenges and growth to allow the arrow to fly. This bending is a humbling process, one that requires us to release and trust that our children’s destinies are already unfolding. It can also be seen as the inner work and shadow work we find ourselves doing for the greater good of those we love. ‘Custodian parenting’ is about finding balance between holding on and letting go, between guiding and stepping back and this we can only find when we are connected to who we authentically are – with our own connection to the Divine. Our role is not to micro-manage our children’s paths but to nurture, observe and encourage them as they discover their unique journeys. By embracing this, we honour not only our children but also the Divine plan that flows through them — and through us.
So, let us step into the present moment and dare to look through unveiled eyes so we can behold our unique parenting journeys – for it is a journey of introspection and growth, of light and love. Let us hold our children — yes — but not too tightly. Let us guide them but also allow them to be the inspired authors of their lives. And, most importantly, let us love them fully and wholly, just as they are. “The parenting journey is a glorious dance between souls. So may we revere it as such and simply… dance along…”
Gérraine Rosenkrantz is a seasoned NLP, EFT, mBIT Master Coach, with a BA (Hons.) Psych. Counselling degree, Gérraine brings all her experience into her daily life and surroundings with vigor! She lives fully and believes anyone can create their dream life, interwoven with grace, wisdom, love and joy. She touches hearts and lives through her writing, by hosting various workshops and with public speaking engagements. Her passion towards conscious parenting is founded on her love of working with relationships holistically, honouring it as a living ecosystem of flow. Beyond her professional pursuits, Gérraine is just a homeschooling mom of 4 gorgeous souls, a passionate writer, weaving mystical insights into everyday life to inspire transformation. For her, life is a daily practice of infusing spiritual awareness into every moment, with as much fun as possible. She finds immense joy in exploring the world with her adventurous spirit, as she believes that each experience is there to enrich our understanding of ourselves and the universe.
Carl Jung said: “You are born on a day and you take on the energy of the day.”
As a code coach, I help parents unravel the potential of their children through an understanding of the unique numbers that make up their day of birth.
On the day we are born, the exact placement of the numbers on the day imprints a code which determines the personality of the person. It highlights their strengths and potential blind spots. There are a number of different systems that use numbers and obviously all of these methods yield results. The code is different from astrology or Meyers Briggs or the enneagram. It is called the code (adapted from the original human pin code). It is about understanding the unique makeup of your child or yourself.
Real love is irreplaceable in parenting, but having a deeper insight into your child’s personality through their birth code gives you an edge. Knowing your child’s preferences, tendencies and inclinations helps you, as a parent, to adjust your approach, making parenting more assured and effective.
Only with real knowledge can we go forward in life. It is the deeper layer that I try to reveal and I read it from the unique code that the birth date unfolds.
From having examined hundreds of codes and from my own experience, I am able to uncover the true character or flavour of the person behind the code. When you observe a child you always notice certain behavioural traits that seem specific to the child. If you know the code of the child you will be far more likely to observe particular traits with certainty and then, as a parent, you can adjust your attitude to your parenting, as it is determined by your knowledge.
A child who is naturally caring and loving, could also be very insecure. Or the child could love learning and always be keen to learn something new and yet be subject to overwhelm and confusion. How do you handle this? I look at the code and highlight the complementary strengths that you can focus on. I try to highlight practical insights and tools to help you, as a parent, to support the child’s strengths and to turn their potential blind spots or challenges to the good.
In the case of the child who is naturally gifted with the ability to organise, you can encourage them to develop this skill. Yet you need to understand that the flip side to this natural ability is an intensity and rigidity that can be just too much. By recognising the instinctive strength that this gift presents, one can help the child to adjust their behaviour to strengthen the positive aspects of the quality and turn down the intensity. This will support the child’s natural organisational abilities. With the parent’s understanding and clarity the gift is amplified and a balance is established.
With the gift of patience, its flip side may be a lack of confidence. In the case of quick thinking, its flip side may manifest as nervousness.
If you understand the deeper landscape of your child you are alerted to the possibilities that are inherent in the child as the code reveals it. In particular, one can see from the code how a person will respond under stress. Some will immediately retreat and become frozen with silence from the shock and then become confused and illogical. Others will face it head on and become verbal and immediately come up with a plan. Others will be stubborn and immovable in their approach. One gets surprised by the reactions of a child under stress. A naturally sensitive child may deal with stress with a cool head while an extroverted child could appear in an opposite guise. There are so many approaches to stress. The code reveals these details and, as a parent, you can understand the child’s reactions far more easily and support them with more wisdom.
You are probably wondering what the code can reveal about those born on the same day and, in particular, twins. The answer is that from the code I can see which aspect each child is bringing to the fore as a result of the relationship – the synergy – they share with each other. Twins are like any relationship. They are unique individuals, but the special bond they share with each other determines what aspect will be stronger in their individual personalities. As in any relationship, we mask certain traits. Bear in mind that it is in relationships that we grow. Twins are the same. The relationship they have is their greatest test and opportunity. Then, as a parent, you are helped to unmask the relationship they have and to focus on the positives/strengths that each twin brings. I alert you to these aspects and introduce you to a different dynamic in your parenting approach.
I always focus on supporting the positive skill of the child. In a situation where children are more outgoing and vocal in their communication, they may struggle with criticism. At the same time they may be very caring and loving. If you concentrate on reprimanding them constantly you lose touch with their gentle side and you may find yourself with a problem you could have avoided had you focused on the caring nature of this child. Yet the more vocal, forceful character of the child could have hidden his sensitivity and often his vulnerability. Sensitivity in children is so often misunderstood, as is hyperactivity. Learning to understand the various aspects and gifts that the child presents enables one to get a clear and concise overview of the child. The code will always show me what the child is about. I can see if the child tends to be imaginative or analytical, logical or curious, practical or illogical, patient or nervous. Then one learns to balance the various aspects.
In the case of the child who constantly needs to complete tasks as opposed to one who rushes from task to task, you need to adjust your approach as a parent to the child and, once you have a sense of certainty as to their instinctive pattern, you can deal more effectively with the behaviour that the child presents. It’s all in the code and, as a parent, you can really learn to know your child and deeply connect to their aspirations, which may be deeply hidden. If you know what they are about, you can help yourself and them to adjust their reactions and so strengthen their true selves and connect to their deep purpose in life.
Every child brings their own gifts to their lives and we try as parents to help them recognise their path and to learn to focus on their innate strengths. If you really know your child you can help them to develop their natural skills more easily and overcome their personal obstacles far more quickly. You want your child to find a career and life path that resonates with their strengths and enables them to shine their light in the world. This is what conscious parenting is about: Really parenting with knowledge and not with a hit-and-miss approach. It makes your life easier and gives you more assurance as a parent. If you know the code of the child, you will know the child.
Contact me for an in-depth code discussion, either in a written format or face to face or online. Join me and crack your code!
